Charles Lee

Every so often I find myself being unfairly critical about someone else’s work. In retrospect, many of these moments of non-constructive criticism were rooted in my insecurity and jealousy of the other person’s “success”. The success of others is difficult to swallow for most of us competitive entrepreneurs. Our pride often convinces us that if we were given the same set of circumstances as the person we are jealous of, we would have been as succesful, if not more.

Have you ever been guilty of this?

Whether you’ve been on the side of being unfairly critical or on the side of sensing the jealousy of others, the reality is that these kinds of engagements quickly become infantile and unproductive (if not straight out mean) for both involved.

I have to confess that there were moments earlier in my life when I intentionally played with and pressed into the jealousy I sensed from others in order to evoke a response. In other words, I rubbed it in! As a result, I caused more unnecessary strife and pain in these relationships. I told you this could get infantile.

Fortunately, I’m getting better as I get older. I find myself play this comparison/jealousy game less and less as the years go by. Here’s why:

• It’s not worth the energy. There are so many other things we could and should be consumed with that have far more noble purposes.
• Non-constructive criticism is just that…non-constructive.
• The issue is not the other person, but US. Criticism reveals more about our character than the one we’re criticizing.
• Most of the conflict is fictional and imaginary. It is not rooted in reality. It’s perceptions, not fact. No one knows the whole story.
• You can become a whole lot more productive and stronger if you celebrate the good of your “competitor”. Who knows? You might actually learn a thing or two.
• The jealousy of others can give you a false sense of “success”. Just because someone thinks you’re successful doesn’t mean you actually are.
• You’re unlikely going to change the other person anyway.

Life is way too short to be tripped over by such shallow forms of engagement. Focus on the positives of life. Decide to live in optimism and look on the bright side for anything that comes up in life. Put your energy towards productive good and seeing the good in others. I promise that life will be far more enjoyable this way.

Life Scribbles is a blog category I created to jott down quick notes about various topics and personal interests. These notes (including questions) are meant to be short, thought-provoking, relatively open, and purposefully unresolved. I’m hoping that these Life Scribbles will challenge or refine perspectives, create meaningful conversations, and lead to further inquiry about the topics presented.

This post is tagged Enterpreneurs, Jealousy, Life Scribbels, Network, Relationship, Success